Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
