Is it normal to miss your booty call?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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