You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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