i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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