I am full of burrito and curiosity
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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