i barfeds in our rink
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
