I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I deserve this hangover.
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