In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
