Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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