There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize