I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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