that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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