ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
