Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent

(860): View more from Connecticut

fuckk wrong person

(1-860): View more from Connecticut

.. who was that for? a girlscout?

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(256): View more from Alabama

My hair reeks of homosexuality.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.

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(907): View more from Alaska

good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?

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(208): View more from Idaho

He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.

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(705): View more from Ontario

He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.

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(936): View more from Texas

Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.

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(315): View more from New York

Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.

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