oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Randomize
