So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
