You work out of a Hotel?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
