how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize