I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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