He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
