I think I am morally bankrupt
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
