I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
