forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
you never un-have a 4some
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
