I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
