shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
