if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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