You can't special order awesome
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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