If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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