Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
