DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
