Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
