Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
