I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize