i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
