I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
