plz talk dirty to me
I wanna passion pit in your ass
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
