Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
