Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
smell my finger.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize