This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
i now understand why vodka
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
