i wish starbucks made bloody marys
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize