D3 body, D1 cock
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize