Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
