My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize