Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
COCAINE IS GR8
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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