That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize