yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
