I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
