we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
