i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I am spending my child support on dildos
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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