During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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