...so i touched it.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
