what day is it and did you see me today?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize